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It’s Christmas, So I’m Supposed To Be Happy…Right? — No Comments

  1. Hello Brother Stillman,

    Its Sean again I hope you are well and after reading what you said I do agree, I have been down at Christmas, and while I do miss my grandfather it has been two years I do think It is something else, I am very close to my mother whenever she is upset I get upset. I do not know why but I think it has to do with my mother being alone I have no right to tell exatlcy what happend but I will say this mom has been divorced twice, and is very unhappy, she does belive in god with all her heart, but she hates to be alone she says she needs to feel loved ect. I dont know why I felt upset, I was upset then happy, then upset and then happy, I took my medicne and I felt better, then it repated until we had my moms sister come over, my cousin..lets call him d is a far left liberal atheist, so i didnt even bother trying to make him belive, my other cousin M, does belive in a higherpower, I dont know them that well. It was a funny time, but all my efforts are in vain, and I do admit I have not found a church to go to yet, I have veen working and going to school but i have been making time to pray more and more, but i have this weird feeling in my body, some days i feel like the holly spirit is within me then some days I feel like its not there, I have been getting better, But for some reason I keep going back on those dumb stupid blogs that preach hate. Then I get upset at what they say and then I do something that goes against what Jesus would want like porn and stuff, I have been praying for god to help me and cleanse my mind of what these people preach, but I know god wants me to make a effort, I could have eaisly not click on those sites and move on but for some reason I always end up reading those comments and then I feel dark thougths that I know is the devil trying to make me feel guilty and when I pray those thoughts go away they do, but before I get off topic, I think why christmas didnt feel like christmas because I felt like it was just anouther day. I know I shouldnt feel like that, but i think it had to do with my moms negtive engry, she is sad and lonely about not having someone to love her and I think its rubbing off one me.

    anyway I hope you had a wonderfull christams and a happy new year.

    with love

    sean b

    • Sean, I’m deeply sorry for your difficulties. You really should stay away from those blogs, if they take you to a place you don’t want to go. If you would prayerfully read our article on generational curses, and take the steps that it recommends, you would be free from porn and other harmful activities. I’ll be praying that you will one day come to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ that you may be set free. God bless you and have a blessed and safe new year.

      Tony

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